Tuesday 24 March 2020

Lock Down Diaries. Day 6.


Sainsburys was not crowded and had everything on my list. I was the only one with a Snood for protection, even the staff had no masks. You know if I was a teacher, on the first day at school I’d ask all the fresh young faces, “Why have you come?” I’m pretty sure the closest I’d get to an answer would be, ‘mum sent me’ or ‘We gota come ain’t we.’ Thenceforth up to being a forty-year-old supermarket floor manager thoughts wouldn’t stray far from, ‘Well they ain’t said nofink about this’, or ‘they did say sumink but I forgot it and anyway they ain’t around are they’. So if school is a primer for not thinking what hope is there we can outwit a virus? Then the school picks on the befuddled Latin teacher, Boris Cuthbert Johnson whose classes start with thirty and drift down to seven after forty-five minutes, to make the important announcements. No, without a grasp on your own intelligent, informed thoughts you’re doomed. You’ll either think your super impermeability will provide immunity or be so overcome with fear your immune system will be on its knees before you even catch a cold. (fear and anxiety do impair your immune system) So when this is all over at least teach our kids how to think! Failing that get them to watch at least an hour of The Simpsons every day. Just watch Homer and learn. It was good advice two thousand years ago and it’s good advice now.

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