Thursday 1 July 2010

The Ohmm of Bum.

There is an arse facing you at the lights as you leave Archer Road Sainsburys. A pert, bronzed meter wide bum in short blue towel hot-pants; one cheek low, the other high showing its ripe under-curve, the colour of a sun tanned peach. It’s a place where I am happy to wait for the green filter light. Need a paper or a pint of milk? No problem, I’ll just pop down to Sainsburys. On my return today gazing in rapture at the best feature of a young woman I will never meet I wondered; what exactly am I processing here? Yes it’s sexy and wonderful but that doesn’t really account for the joy behind my thoughtless gaze. It captivates me almost viscerally like the ‘ohmm’ of a Buddhist prayer. My eyes make their passage over it, ohmm, and begin again; like a magnificent alpine hillside drew my vision back again and again in an attempt to take in its grandeur. That bottom is as perfect as nature. Having just watched a little Big Brother it’s a welcome reassurance that that’s possible. As the housemates struggled with each other and the program makes struggled to make a program out of them that viewers need not struggle to watch I am thankful I have my bum to ‘ohmm’ over. Thank you bottom. Oh no pasta sauce? Won’t be a tick. 

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