My Football Blog.

Well Chelsea last night, Man City tonight and rounded off by the second half of Matrix Reloaded. That must be why I’m currently seeing Balotelli in a dark blue strip being whacked a hundred foot into the air by a miffed John Terry in sunglasses. As far as I can tell the Matrix is about cause and effect, a concept Balotelli has yet to grasp. Anyway Man City started confidently enough under an obvious belief that the waterfall of numbers on a screen somewhere would see them easily overcome their one/nil deficit from the first leg; Sporting Lisbon being little more than an upstart Sunday league side. But then Balotelli made a tackle in the style of a Humvie sideswiping a cyclist and Sporting scored from the free kick. This added a new level of difficulty for the home side but made Sporting manager very happy. He apparently looked like Hugh Grant to the Sky commentator but my HD TV portrayed him as more like the vagrant who tried to tap me for 50p last week. Man City continued to play like an overweight Maradona trying to impress his grandson’s primary school side until the kids scored again as Mancini looked on with a thousand mile stare of disbelief. Now they had to score four to win. Eventually they scored one, then a penalty, then scored another. Ten minutes to go and they began to show some urgency, mostly by Balotelli wrenching stricken cyclists back to their feet. Five minutes and the Sporting players took to sitting on the pitch in an effort to make miraculous recoveries from life threatening injuries. Seconds to go and Joe Heart almost headed the winning goal, almost. So Man City are out and Balotelli, whose real name is Illetolab once he gets his bib on right, is still giving, albeit in the style of a scowling tyrannosaurus. Never the less, good one Chelsea, well done!