Tim Doesn’t Give.

Today a little cartoon with message, “Most people want to be liked and accepted…. but Tim doesn’t give a shit”, with Tim drifting up and away under a bunch of red balloons giving the finger to a cluster of onlookers. It’s a glorious example of an unconscious, un-said meaning. The impression is of Tim, floating above the crowd, off to some great adventure, free and bold as his own person. Where he is active (with the finger) the group is earth bound, mute, passive and co-dependant. This little snapshot in Tim’s life shows the wonderful feeling of liberation from ‘not giving a shit.’ It sells the virtues of not giving a shit, but linguistically it deletes any negatives that might get in the way. One doesn’t imagine the onlookers saying, “OK if that’s how you feel, fuck off” because they’re passive. One doesn’t consider that Tim’s great adventure might come unstuck and he’d need some help, or him drifting down to new groups and giving them the finger to or them as an active group giving it to him. No, in this one precise moment everything will be great for Tim; and it’s such a nice name. I’m sure we all contort our own life to suite others and that contortion is best resisted, not by not giving a shit but the reverse, by engagement, not by insularity or arrogance but being with. OK it’s funny but a great example of the deletions and equivalences created to make us think in a certain way, make the obvious conclusion. It’s how we’re sold Coke, fast foods etc etc, and it works. On a therapy course a guy was asked to draw a picture of his special relationship with God. He drew a circle of light from above with him in it and everyone else outside. He had a profound realisation that his ‘special relationship’ was the source of his feelings of isolation. Tim, with is special relationship with himself, reminded me of this moment, a moment that changed the guy’s life for the better.