Matt and the Nation’s Picasso.

Matt Hancock’s previous experience is in computer software, economics, and more recently culture and sport, and even more recently health. Dealing with the Coronavirus must be like being asked to fix the nation’s Citroen Picasso when all he’s ever done before is drive one. In panic he calls the AA, Kwik-fit and a local garage. He finds his AA membership has lapsed, Kwick-fit only do tyres and exhausts so he takes it to the garage. He relays the dealership information to the nation, “It’s probably the coil packs or possibly the mass air flow sensor.” Scrabbling for authority not knowing what any of that means, and to deflect any personal blame in case it all goes tits up, he calls in the expert mechanic to the stand. He says we’ve got the coil packs on order but there could be a delay because of the high demand. Matt retakes the helm and says we’re doing all the right thing at all the right times with the authority of a person who’s never heard of them before and says, "Could we have the next slide please." The expert again, “We fitted the coil packs but that didn’t fix it. We’re going to replace the clutch.” Meanwhile other garage mechanics, hearing of the nation’s predicament, suggest it could be an air leak in the throttle body causing the O2 sensor to go off scale. This is reported in the Guardian. Matt refers this suggestion to his mechanic who dismisses it as the work of an idiot as the O2 sensor is in the exhaust and wouldn’t cause the problem. He adds he’s replacing the camshaft and crankshaft sensors and sorting out a small oil leak in that area. A person in Chipping Sodbury says on This Morning that once his Picasso wouldn’t start because a mouse had made a nest in the exhaust pipe. Matt says it’s heartening to hear you’re all trying your best. At the 5pm grilling Evan Davis asks why we didn’t buy a German car and Sir Keir Starmer suggests Brexit was a big mistake and that car spares are readily available in Europe. Meanwhile Evan further suggests the EGR valve may be stuck from carbon build up and has the government cleaned it? Matt passes that one to the mechanic, the only one out of the three who knows what it is. “Did that while we were fitting a new alternator.” Evan, “And the cam belt?” “What about it?” asked the mechanic. “Well er is it still holding the cams up?” Mechanic, “Yes its fine and the cam braces are fine too.” Evans thanks him for the extra information. The mechanic finishes with, “This problem wouldn’t have occurred if you’d had it regularly serviced.” With thanks to Edmouse for the technical information.